Jul 10, 2015

Mets hold press conference to announce they have acquired Nobody

Photo Source: MLB.com


At 4;45 P.M. Eastern Standard Time, the Mets held an impromptu press conference to announce their newest acquisition, Nobody.  Nobody appeared with Sandy Alderson at the press conference today. Nobody was seated next to Sandy. Alderson was quick to praise nobody, saying that nobody is better than Duda, nobody is better than Wright, nobody bests Flores, although anybody, currently on the Phillies, is better than Tejada.

Pressed for comment, Nobody had much to say about the acquisition. Nobody will wear no one.

Terry Collins, seated next to Nobody, had nothing but praise to heap on the newest acquisition. I can see nobody supplanting one of our regular outfielders. Nobody brings much to the table. With the trade deadline still 21 days away, we might still have one or two moves up our sleeves, Alderson coyly reported, before accidentally sitting on top of nobody.





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